When my son was 21 months of age and we had a newborn baby girl, we took action to help him to sleep better and to get her off to a really, really good start as a new baby. Could we have managed without doing that? Would we have been okay? Probably. But okay wasn’t okay with me. I knew that it could be better.
I was running a business. I knew that I needed to have better sleep. I wanted to take care of my two babies to the best possible standard. I wanted my little ones to get the very best and most healthy start and to get the rest they needed too. So I wasn’t okay with things just being fine.
I wanted things to be the best they could be and that’s okay. It’s okay to want things to be better. We’ve got so stuck in this culture or vibe of, I don’t know, maybe you’re carrying a little extra weight and your friend says, “You look amazing.” That’s really lovely. And maybe you do look amazing, but you might not be exactly where you want to be.
So it’s okay to want it to be better. There’s nothing wrong with wanting more. There’s nothing wrong with wanting better. We are here to, I believe, have the highest level of experience, of existence of our time on this planet. So why should you just settle for fine? Why should it just be okay?
So whilst it’s friendly and nice when our friends tell us that we’re doing great or, “Yeah, you’ve got this.” Sometimes we really haven’t, and it’s okay to acknowledge that and go, “You know what? No. It’s not where I want it to be. I want it to be better. I’m going to make this better.”
The best thing our friends can do for us is hold us accountable, not let us off the hook. And too many times, our friends or well-meaning people out there, they will let us off the hook and almost give us an excuse to go, “Oh, okay. Oh, good. Oh, I don’t need to bother them. Oh, well, it doesn’t matter then. Oh, okay. They’ve told me it’s okay. It’s fine so it doesn’t matter. I don’t need to do anything about that thing.”
Well, listen to yourself because, if you really want to and if you can see that it could be better, then do something about it. Don’t let the outside noise just let you off the hook. If you need holding accountable, you need to put yourself around someone at least or a group or a community of people who will hold you accountable and actually help you to up level and to achieve whatever it is that you’re looking to achieve.
And I say this broadly because it applies to most things. But you’re possibly here because sleep isn’t great or because you want to be a sleep consultant yourself, and either of those things could happen for you. If your little one isn’t sleeping as well as they could, you might have people say to you, “They’ll grow out of it. Oh, it’s normal. Everyone has these kinds of problems.” Does that mean you shouldn’t do anything about it? Does that mean you should just accept it?
I’ve had people saying to me, “Oh, it never did us any harm,” or, “Oh, well, we’re fine and we’ve survived on this,” and “Oh, we don’t need to do it.” That’s great. You do you. If you’re happy and content with what you’ve got, amazing. But if you believe it could be better, if you don’t want to settle for mediocre, if you want to live the most heightened experience of life, then you decide to take the action and you find that person to hold you accountable.
We hold our clients accountable when they work with us on their little one’s sleep. We don’t just collude with them and let them off the hook. A client might say to me, “Oh, well, yeah, but I can’t really do this because at nursery this happens.” I don’t go, “Oh yeah, that’s really difficult. Okay, so let’s not worry about that.” I say, “Okay, I understand that’s a challenge, but we really need to overcome this challenge. So how about we try X, Y, and Z to actually work around that thing that feels like it’s blocking you?”
If I were there to be their best friend and collude and tell them, “Oh, it’s okay. Don’t worry about it,” that’s not going to serve them, that’s not going to help them, and they’re not going to get the results.
I’m there to pull them up on those things and not let them use those excuses to settle, because ultimately, they came to me because they wanted to get to a solution, an outcome that gave them lasting results.
It’s the same with our academy students. When they go through our academy and train to become a sleep consultant, we hold them accountable. We don’t just tell them that their work is fine if we know it could be better. Why? Because we want them to be the very, very best at what they do.
So don’t settle for fine if you want more. It’s okay to want more. It’s admirable to want to level up or to reach a higher standard or to want that for your child. Just because everybody else might be okay with this level, everybody in your particular circle might be coasting on just fine, doesn’t mean you have to too.
Are you enjoying learning about baby and child sleep? It’s such a fascinating topic. Ever wondered if you could be a sleep consultant and run your own business transforming lives and unleashing all your potential?
Try our introductory training on becoming a childhood sleep consultant, right now it’s FREE! Register here: https://www.sleepnannyacademy.com/get-started